Yeah, so. I called my home answering machine from work today and here's what I heard:

"Hi, Esemji. I want to thank you so much for coming in to meet with us a second time. I really appreciate it." Her voice was kind of low and soft, and I braced myself for her next sentence, which was surely going to be some kind of apology for not being able to hire me.

"Everyone really liked you, and we'd like to make you an offer. I think you're going to make an excellent editor. Please call me to discuss the details."

I was so excited I almost jumped out of my chair. An editor! No more staffing! No more temps! No more demanding clients!

You have no idea how huge this is to me. I feel as though I've been in a cage for the last five years, and now someone is offering me the key. It's an awesome feeling. Jennifer, I can finally fill in the other eye on the little doll/statue thingee you gave me (what's it called again?). I filled in one eye waaaay back when you gave it to me, with the goal of getting a new job.

I got the message at the end of the work day, so I was not able to call back and officially accept. It was tortuous.

I'm very, verrrry excited about this. Working where I work now has been wrong in so many ways, for so long. I was beginning to think I would never be able to do anything else. I had reached a point where I was practically sleepwalking through my days, weeks, months, years.

Even though I'm thrilled about this new job, I'm a little bit scared, too. It's scary to think about being "the new girl" and meeting new people, and learning something completely different. Part of me is going to miss the "comfort zone" I have where I work now.

It's been a long time since I've taken a chance like this. It's been a long time since I've risked anything, or tried anything really new. It makes me a little nervous. But it also feels pretty damn good.