When I read stuff like this, I start to think really evil thoughts. Like, "I hope people who live near this guy see this, hunt him down and rip his balls off."

How can anyone be so cruel? You are seriously fucked in the head if you go around torturing defenseless animals. A 17 year-old Yorkie? My God. It's just unbelievable. Makes me absolutely sick to my stomach.

Speaking of dogs, D and I have been trying to get one for a few months now. What's stopping us? We can't decide what kind to get. We are extremely picky about selecting one, because we know what a huge commitment it is.

Originally we decided that our ideal dog would be medium-sized (not over 30 pounds or so), but after going to a few shelters and dog adoption fairs, our opinions have shifted. D now wants a larger dog. "I want a fun dog," he says. "I want one we can throw frisbees to and wrestle with. I don't want a teeny froufy dog that has to go in the scaredy-dog part of the dog park." (At the dog park we've visited, there's a fenced-in area for "small or skittish dogs ONLY.")

This is a problem. A dog I can wrestle with is not at the top of my list. I want a fun dog, but one that won't mind hanging out with me while I edit. I want one that is somewhat mellow and really loving and sweet. I don't mind a dog with a lot of energy, but I definitely don't want a big, slobbery dog that drags me down the street when I walk it. Don't get me wrong - I don't want a froufy dog, either. Purse dogs don't appeal to me.

Honestly, I wouldn't mind another dog exactly like Shamus (dear, dear Shamus!), but we've ruled out cocker spaniels. (They tend to have a lot of medical issues and require frequent grooming.)

So we've looked online, we've scoured the newspapers, and I can tell you everything you need to know about the temperament, exercise levels, grooming requirements and intelligence of about five million different kinds of dogs, but we have yet to come up with a suitable compromise. We are miles apart. We've actually both looked at the same dog and said simultaneously, "That dog's ugly!" and "I love that dog!" Doesn't look good.