I weighed in this past Saturday, and after a full week of eating the WW way, I lost a grand total of 1.2 pounds. Doh!

Honestly, I really didn't follow the plan exactly. D and I ate out Saturday and Sunday nights, and our general sentiment was "points be damned" both evenings. So I guess I should feel lucky that I lost anything at all.

This week hasn't started off well. Again, we pigged out Saturday and Sunday nights. It couldn't be avoided. It was D's birthday, and everyone knows that you're not allowed to diet on your birthday. As for me, I couldn't let him eat alone, could I? That wouldn't have been very nice.

As of yesterday I am back on wagon and hope to finish out the week strong.

***

I shopped for a wedding dress Sunday with my mom, and oh my god, it was mightily strange to see myself in a wedding dress. My mom beamed the whole time. "How do you feel?" she asked.

"Like I'm in a nightmare," I said.

Let me explain. It's not that marrying D is a nightmare or anything. What I was trying to convey was the sense of surreality I was experiencing. It was like an out-of-body experience, seeing myself in the full-length mirror, all veiled and princessy.

"I guarantee you are the ONLY bride in this shop feeling like that," my mom said disppointedly.

My poor mom. She's definitely a modern woman, but she's old school in a lot of ways too. She still believes every happy ending involves a wedding and a happily ever after, god love her.

I know I sound more cynical about matrimony than a woman who is to be married in a few months should, but I can't help it. I want to believe in happily ever after, I do! It's just that I have witnessed very few examples of happy marriages in my lifetime, and although I'm looking forward to marrying D with a lot of happiness and hope, I would be lying if I said that there isn't also a teeny, teeny tiny bit of jaded skepticism also.

That sounds terrible. I'm not really conveying exactly what I want to, but I think I'll leave it there.